Blah, blah, blah

I am just having a blah week. Nothing exciting happening (besides our 1st anniversary on Monday), and not feeling great. I just feel blah. I am excited about our anniversary and I can't wait to enjoy our night out and our day together and the gifts! We are going out to dinner the night before, then on Monday I am taking a half day and we are just going to relax and celebrate just the 2 of us. I will make a nice dinner and we will eat our cake and open presents!
I think I am feeling so blah because we have yet another month down. It is officially cycle number 45 for us. That means we are over 3 years now trying to conceive. It doesn't seem like that long, but then again it seems like forever. When will it be our turn? Will we have to spend thousands and thousands of dollars to realize our dream of becoming parents? Will we never be able to get pregnant (and stay pregnant)? I guess I am just feeling sorry for myself.
Stop it! Enough! I need to get my butt to the gym and start losing more weight. We need to just go about our daily lives and enjoy each other and enjoy being married. That's it, I'm done ttc for right now. I am going to enjoy life and enjoy my husband and get healthy! All the while I will look at baby stuff and try to make that ache in my heart go away.
Good luck to everyone ttc and I hope everyone has a wonderful week!

Update

I went to the doctors on Thursday, and I have lost another 4 pounds in 2 weeks. This is perfect! I am supposed to lose 1-2 lbs per week with the band. So I am right on target. This brings my total up to 56 lbs. I am about 30 lbs away from my first goal, and 170 away from my total goal. I hope to lose the 30 lbs by mid summer, and an additional 60-70 by the end of 2010. Dh and I are joining the gym down the street so I can bump up the weigth loss.
We are currently on cycle #45 of ttc. I am going to concentrate on losing weight and loving my husband. I think I will stop keeping track of everything and just go with it. If, by the time I have reached my weight loss goal we still aren't pregnant or have a baby, I will go back to Dr. Russell and start IUI's.
Well, I am off to eat my breakfast. Have a wonderful week!

New house pictures!

The first picture is the beautiful set of windows in our master suite (it feels so weird to say that!). The second picture is the view from the living room into the kitchen! The third and fourth pictures are of the kitchen .


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This is the beautiful kitchen! It is so wonderful to have such a large amount of counter space and the cabinets! The one to the left of the dishwasher is empty still, as are all the top shelves in every cabinet because I can't reach them!

I just wanted to share this with you. We are so blessed and feel so fortunate to have such a wonderful place to live!

Tomorrow is my 6 week post op appointment with the surgeon. I am super nervous about getting on the scale! I want to post a picture from October and then a picture DH just took, but I am too nervous! I will update after the appointment!

I can't figure out why the pictures and the text are so funky, oh well!

Celebrations!

Our first wedding anniversary is fast approaching! We are going to celebrate the night before at the restaurant we got married at. Then we are going to eat the top tier of the cake on May 3! It feels like we've been married forever, and who can remember what life was like before I met the most wonderful person in the world?
I go to the doctor on Thursday for my 6 week post op appointment. I am eating better and staying full for much longer. My breakfasts consist of:
1 hard boiled egg
1 oz almonds
3 slices apple
8 grapes
4 tbls peanut butter
1 mini multigrain bagel
It usually takes me 1/2 hour or so to eat it all, and it usually keeps me full for 3-4 hours. For lunch I have a salad, some fruit or some easy mac. I hve an afternoon snack of wheat thins and cheese or fruit. Dinner has been homemade (YAY!), mostly chicken with a side and a veg, sometimes beef or turkey. Sometimes we still order in or go out, but we have been enjoying dinner at home with each other. It is so nice to have a beautiful home to be in. I am going to post pictures tonight of the kitchen. We are so blessed.
I am planning to POAS on our anniversary if AF doesn't show her ugly head by then. What a wonderful anniversary present that would be!
I think if this month is a bust, I just want to concentrate on being healthier and being thankful for all we have. We have so much to be thankful for!
Have a wonderful week!

Moving Down!

We are officially in our new home (and it is so beautiful!), and I am officially at my new job! We are slowly working on getting the house together. It is coming along, just have to find storage space for stuff you don't use on a daily basis but need to keep, you know? Old pictures, sentimental stuff you can't get rid of, and if you are crazy like me.....baby stuff you've been collecting for 3+ years since a miscarriage. It's ridiculous the amount of baby stuff we already have!
I mean we have a stroller/car seat combo, crib bedding set, monitor, a bunch of clothes and a pooh bear towel, a bunch of toys that were given to us, and not to mention a hammock/glider thingy I got at a garage sale on day. I am obsessed! "Normal" people do not collect baby stuff in an effort to curb the heart wrenching desire to have a child! Only people who are dealing with infertility understand the obssesion with baby "stuff". I think I have done more research into what is good, what is bad, what's new, what's being discontinued, what I want, what I need and what I have to have........IF we become pregnant and have a baby!
It makes me crazy, and I know it drives DH crazy. He will ask me over and over, why do you do that to yourself? Why are you looking at baby stuff? Why?????? I wish I had the answer! I wish it wasn't such an intense almost physical urge to look at baby stuff! Hopefully I am not the only loony one out there (but I probably am!).
In regards to my weigth loss, I am eating my protein now instead of drinking it and I hope it's working. DH and I went on a nice walk around our new neighborhood last night. We met some super friendly people down the street with 2 very cute little pups. It's nice to live in an area where people can let their kids ride their bikes and play outside like we used to when we were young. We went and peeked at the pool, and it is big! I can't wait to swim!!!
Well, now that I have rambled and rambled about nothing.....have a blessed week!!

Everything's good!

Well, my DVT test went good, they didn't see anything to worry about. I took my last Lovenox injection this morning! YAY!!! No more bruised belly and stingy shots! My 1 month post op went well. I only lost another 3 lbs or so, but that's because I am so hungry! They officially told me to start eating regular food. No more liquids, so now I can start eating like a regular person again! Just in very small amounts. I have to really bulk up on my protein. I have to pick proteins that you have to chew so I will feel full longer. I have another appointment in 2 weeks so they can see if the hunger has subsided with food you actually have to chew.
The good news is that I don't have to come all the way back upstate to see my doctor. He has an office about mid-state, so the drive should only be 45 mins to an hour, instead of 1 1/2-2 hours.
My RE also has an office closer to us downstate, so I will be able to see both of these amazing doctors even though we are moving 2 hours away!
Saturday is my last day at this office. It hasn't quite hit me yet cause we're still living up here, but I am excited nonetheless! I hope to get the house in some semblance of order this weekend. I got the kitchen almost all the way unpacked, I just have a few things to put on the counter.
My mother-in-law and I went to Bed Bath & Beyond the other night to finish shopping for the new house, and it was a lot of fun! I spent too much money (like I always do!), but I got a ton of good stuff. I am addicted to that store, they really need to build one by my new house.
Well, I will update once we are settled into the new house! Have a blessed week everyone!

DVT test today

I have my DVT test this afternoon at 4 pm. I am nervous! I am sure there are not any blood clots as I have been on the blood thinner for almost 30 days now, but we cannot be positive about it, so it needs to be checked. I also go in for my 1 month post op tomorrow afternoon.
We are moving!!!! We just have a few final arrangements to be made, and we are outta here this weekend! I am getting super excited.
Hopefully the sun and salt water will bring us a little water baby soon!
I will update after my appointments! Have a good week!