You'll never guess what we just found out!!!

Doctor's appointment

Well, I had another doctor's appointment yesterday and lo and behold......I didn't gain or lose a single pound in 3 weeks! We decided it was time for a fill! I was freaked out about it, but it didn't hurt one little bit. It sounded weird, but didn't hurt. I got 3 cc's put in my band and am on soft chewable foods today. I had a protein drink this morning and a yogurt. I have chili for lunch and then I'll see how I feel.
I'm hoping to join the gym this week or next and get our rear ends over there!
We went to visit with my Momma and say Happy Birthday and it looked like a tornando hit her area! Both windchimes were mangled on the ground (broken beyond repair), her flag was bleached and beat up from the sun and wind and her statue was tipped over. The winnie the pooh wind sock was no where to be found. It was a good thing I brought a new windchime and flag for her! We are currently looking for ideas on how to make her beach better. Right now she has sand from Florida in front of the headstone. We have the black weed paper underneath and a green plastic thing in a circle in front holding the sand in. The sand just looks bad, it gets all nasty. We are trying to think of a way to make it look better. Dave said maybe get a plastic container and make a beach scene and put it in front. I just don't know! We will figure it out!
I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

Sad day

Today is my beautiful Momma's birthday! I love and miss her so much. It is tearing me up inside. It will be 7 years in June that she passed away and so much has changed. I so desperately want her to be here. I wanted her to meet Dave and to be here when we had our miscarriage. I want her to be around for her grandbabies (if we are blessed enough!). I'm just having a tough time, I feel so angry. The range of emotions that I am dealing with today is incredible. I am sad, angry, pissed off, frustrated, terrified and everything in between!

I am so scared that I will forget her, that our babies will never know what a wonderful person she was. Sometimes I feel like the only person in the world who thinks about her (although I know that is so not true)

Nobody really knows this, but I have 3 younger siblings. They are my mom and ex step dad's kids. I haven't seen them since the summer my Mom passed away. So every year it's like remembering not just 1 person I love, but 3 more. I wish I could see them but circumstances between their father and me are not good. When my Mom passed my youngest brother was only 5. My sister was 7 and my brother was 9. They were so little, and I worry that they won't remember or know who she was. They need to know that she was a wonderful, caring, beautiful woman who loved her kids more than life. She wanted to do nothing more than take care of her kids and give them everything. We struggled, money was always an issue, but we wanted for nothing. She always made sure we had what we needed. So today is the day we all say Happy Birthday to the best Mom in the world. The one I emulate and I hope to be like her if we are blessed with babies.

Happy Birthday Mom!!!