Baby girl is 4 1/2 months old! Time is flying by! At her 4 month appointment she weighed 13 lbs exactly and was 23 3/4" long!!! She is getting so big. She fits perfectly in 6 month sleepers. Her 3 month and 3-6 month stuff is getting a little tight in the feet and is stretching to capacity in the length. She is babbling away and her smile is the most beautiful smile in the world.
I miss her like crazy all day at work. The only positive is that she is home with Daddy. I always feel better leaving in the morning because she is napping on Daddy's chest.
I am still breastfeeding, and dang proud of it. I feel like this is quite an accomplishment seeing as it took a good 6 weeks for the pain to go away. I think once I hit 6 weeks is when the anxiety every feeding went away. I no longer wanted to quit and give her formula everytime she was hungry. I would literally tear up at the thought of breastfeeding her one more time. It was so painful and I was so tired and sore from the c-section. I wish someone had been honest and up front with me on how difficult it was going to be. I know some woman have it very easy and they have no pain at all. My LC told me about 60 times that once I hit the 2 week mark it would be all better. Well, 2 weeks came and went and I struggled. I thought it must be me. I must be my fault. I must be doing something wrong! Baby girl latched well, I used lanolin like it was going out of style, I leaked, I did everything I was told to do. 6 weeks. 6 weeks. 6 weeks. If someone asked me for my honest opinion on breastfeeding...I'd tell them this:
It is the most rewarding, comforting, wonderful experience for both me and my daughter. It is also the one thing that made me doubt my abilities to parent my child. It is the one thing that made me feel like a failure everytime. A Mom shouldn't cry at the thought of feeding her child. She shouldn't look at her baby with tears pouring down her cheeks distraught at the thought of giving her a bottle of formula. I was made to think that if I gave my daughter one bottle of formula I was damaging her insides forever. It is not a comforting thought. But, in the end I am so glad I stuck it out and kept going. I wouldn't trade my time nursing my daughter for anything. It is our special time and I cherish it. My husband looked at us one day and said he was so happy I decided to nurse because not only was I feeding our daughter, I was nourishing her. It was the most beautiful thing I heard.
And while I think it is wonderful that breastfeednig worked for me, I think about how bad the LC made me feel at the thought of feeding her formula. Why do we do that? Why do we make people feel bad about their decisions? As long as you are taking care of your child and feeding them, who cares how? Formula or breastmilk, solids at 4 months or 6 months, cloth diapering or disposable diapering, co sleeping or not, vaxing-non vaxing-delayed vaxing, cir'd vs non-cir'd. These are the decisions that we make that we get criticized and scrutinized for when we should be celebrating and cheering for our fellow Mommy's. I say, however you want to raise your child, as long as it is a happy healthy environment is up to you...and we should be supportive!!!
I support you fellow Mommy's!
And on a side note.....Baby girl is a fish! She loves the water, and we are so blessed to have a pool in our community!
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